Alone

Hi everyone, today is one of those days where I am feeling pretty low. I always seem to feel at the minute with my two friends at school that I don’t matter, I had been friends with one of them for years and then all of a sudden she decides to include someone else and now we are all “best friends” and I feel like she got bored of me and is slowly replacing me. They have little jokes I’m not in on, always talking and laughing. I mentioned a few times to my friend that I feel replaced and left out but she gets mad and tells me to “shut up, its not just us two its us three. You make me seem like a bad friend when you say that” and of course I then feel bad but I can’t help it, that’s just me. I need reassurance that you still like me, or want me. At the minute I just feel like I’m never getting that reassurance because I’m not wanted any more. This morning I went onto Pinterest and they had both changed their profile pictures, this is going to sound jealous and stupid to some of you, to a picture of them two together (without me) on a day where they went out together. So of course me being me and feeling like I was anyway, I saw that and it just crushed me. I have never felt more unwanted and I just was broken. I get so upset about stuff like this, all I could think was “bet they were talking about me” “they were so glad they had a day away from me” “bet they wish it was just them, that was their way of telling me they hate me” and on and on. I just feel like people are such hard work sometimes. They hurt you, break you and I just think what’s the point? Its just easier being alone, away from everything and everyone. But then I thought “the whole reason you are sad is because you feel alone and isolated so your solution or way to feel better about the situation is to be alone and isolate yourself?”

I have a problem , I want to be alone, but I don’t want to be lonely.

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8 thoughts on “Alone

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  1. Awwwnnn… Is it just me or does everyone get to experience this at a point in time??? Well, I’d tell you to just cheer up. If really your friends don’t want you anymore, a better one will come by soon ❤️❤️

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  2. Hey OMG I totally get you I am in a similar situation in fact its one of my posts on my blog it’s about the exact same thing: Feeling left out and hurt. If you ever need to talk to anyone then don’t hesitate. You will get through this!! I don’t want to say they aren’t deserving of you if they treat you like that. That is what I would normally say but because I know what you are going through I know it won’t help at all becaue deep down you just like them so much you want to forgive them some way, start over and remain close to them so you’ll start blaming yourselves thinking did I do something to drive them away? Am I not good enough? and everyone says don’t think like that but I know it’s hard to not do so I won’t say that. All I know is that I belive everything happens for a reason. Although it may not occur to you at first later when you look back on the situation you will have learnt something or at least see why it happened. XXX hang in there that’s all I can say

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Hey actually you know my latest post it was actually inspired by talking to you. So thx for pushing me!!! I realy apreicate it because I feel so much better now that I don’t have to hide who I am. xxxx

        Liked by 1 person

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